Twas the night before Christmas and all through the house,
You could hear me grumble, mumble and grouse.
The socks on the mantle were no longer there,
The cats had taken them, only heaven knows where
The children were screaming and wrecking their beds
Playing games with VR sets strapped to their heads
While Connie was yelling and raising a flap
So Meeko would stop trying to get on her lap
The whole scene was crazy: mad as a hatter
if something else happened well what could it matter
Four dogs barked and ran for the door
Then Meeko stopped and peed on the floor
I opened the door in the new fallen snow
to see Sunny the Rooster free ranging below
When suddenly I jumped straight up in fear
As Meeko ran howling with a cat on each ear.
And grumpy old Libby, still lively and quick
was chewing on cookies meant for St Nick.
You call them pets but they were worse than a flame
stampedes of destruction their favorite game.
Out Libby, Out Meeko, out Gracie and Rex
You cats better cool it or you will be next!
To the top of the dog house, over looking the wall
Get back here Gracie, before you fall!
All our papers and pens had learned how to fly
When Bookworm was clearing a place for to lie.
And Christmas cards strewn all over the floor
Where Captain had left them as she went out the door
Out in the chicken coop, as the snow flew
Chicken Girl chastised a chicken or two
No one is laying, not Noya or Ren
Not one single egg from one single hen.
Connie was wanting to put up the tree
But feared that Meeko would drown it in pee
And Rex would fight Gracie for each Christmas treat
and Libby would chew shoes off everyone’s feet
So we jarred up some honey to spread Christmas cheer
Giving thanks bees hibernate this time of year
Bam Bam came home from his day on the job
letting back in the wild canine mob.
Meeko destroyed a third of the house,
but still couldn’t catch that pesky gray mouse.
And Libby, so old, came in the door last
but an expert at mayhem, she’s catching up fast.
Harley and Adora, the crab and the cat
stay to themselves as they eat and get fat
Of course you spilled flour when making bread
but how did you get it on all the dog’s heads?
Through all this mess, we smile and recall
It’s Jesus’ birthday, and He saved us all.
It’s not about presents or recalcitrant pets
It doesn’t matter what anyone gets.
The GIFT that was given that first Christmas Day
Didn’t come from an elf or ride on a sleigh
It came directly from God’s righteous hand,
The gift of salvation from heaven to man.
And our final message with out all the jokes
Merry Christmas to all from the homestead old folks
Ed and Connie